                           The Church of Hemp
                                Take one
                                  (hit that is!)
           
Gypsy: I'd like to be in the Church of Hemp.
Lyfe Smyth: Is there really one?
Gypsy: I think I just started it!

Thus was born The Church of Hemp, a not so legendary religion born of
that ever so special plant we pay homage to, known to the world as Hemp.  
Gypsy became the now infamous Pope of the Church of Hemp, with Lyfe Smyth
as his High Priest.  Jade and Z Maestro became the Arch-Bishop and Bishop 
through the sacred ceremony known as dibs.  Upon declaring their titles,
a cloud of smoke surrounded them.  All sights and sounds faded into a 
state of numb limbo as they inhaled and exhaled in slow, deep breaths.  Grins
slowly appeared upon their faces.  Jade then noticed that the bong they
had been smoking, affectionately known as Sgt. Peppers, was still empty and 
that the smoke was coming from the walls around them!  
"We are in the precense of a God," Pope Gypsy gasped in awe.  He 
stared into the smoke, searching and caught a glimpse of an eye in the middle
of a huge column of smoke.  Almost immediately afterwards, the smoke became 
denser and thicker until they were all blinded in a state of unseeing bliss.
After a minute or two it began to disperse, a few seconds after the smoke 
left the room, every exhaled in unison.
"Now THAT was a hit!," Z Maestro exclaimed with a very wide grin
upon his face.  "Who or what was that?"
"We were in the precense of some high God," High Priest Smyth 
murmered. 
"You're right, that was a God, and that God was most certainly high!"
Pope Gypsy said with a smile.  "That was Shiva, the God of true sight, 
enlightenment, and of course, Ganja!  Yes, we were in the precense of the 
High God of Hemp!"
The all shuddered with rememberance of the celestial smoke they were
surrounded by only minutes ago.
"Why do He appear before us?" Bishod Maestro wondered aloud.
High Priest Smyth explained "To let us know that we are his chosen, 
and it is our duty to spread the words Shiva, to re-establish his position as
the High God of Hemp, to inform the world of his precense and to teach the
uninformed of the proper ceremonies in order to pay homage to him.  We must
show the world how to properly prepare the burnt offerings and the proper
phrases to recite before partaking in the celebration of hemp.  We are his
chosen, and we must not fail him!"
Arch Bishop Jade heard his words and set down to think.  He looked 
about for a writing utensil, and upon not finding one, he grabbed a cigarette 
paper, spread it out upon the table and then proceeded to dip his pen into Sgt.
Pepper's bowl.  He coated it with resin and then set about writing the sacred
Vows of Hemp (thus earning him the holy hame, Resin Boy).  That cigarette 
paper now resides in the Museum of Hemp Through History, in Boulder Colorado.
"It was at this point that Pope Gypsy exclaimed "Om Shiva Shin-kari,
Hare Hare Ganja!  Om Shiva Shin-kari, Hare Hare Ganja!"  The others gaped at 
him in bewielderment.  "He must be stoned out of his gourd,"  Bishop Maestro
exclaimed under his breath.
"I have been inspired!  I have seen light of Shiva and read the words
within his eyes!  We must give thanks to the High God of Hemp!"  He fell to 
his knees repeating to himself "Om Shiva Shin-kari, Hare Hare Ganja!"  Slowly
it began to sink into the minds of the others.  "This must be the sacred 
prayer, giving thanks to the High God Shiva for blessing us with the precense
of Hemp on this world!"  Then they too fell to their knees, singing in 
unison "Om Shiva Shin-Kari, Hare Hare Ganja!"  So it was that the Sacred
Prayer of Shiva was born, known forever more as the Blessing before Baking.
That is the prayer that must be recited three times by all present who are 
about to partake in the ancient ceremony known as Partaking of the Sacred
Herb (in other words, smoking up!).
Thus was born the Church of Hemp!
                                ---Humble chronicler of The Church
                                     High Priest Lyfe Smyth

Thanks go out to:
The members of The Underground for teaching me how to build a red box
at least once a week.  If it weren't for your constant reminding,
I might forget.  For that, I thank you.
 
Pope Gypsy.  He's the man.  'Nuff said.
 
Z Maestro for first turning me on to the disese known as ISCA.
 
The members of #warez for being there for me when I needed you most.
Where would I be without you?  I'd almost forgotten just how much the word
Elite means to me.  I'm forever in your debt guys.
 
And of course, thanks to Eris.  Hey, even Shiva needs to get laid once in 
a while and Cthulhu just isn't his type.
 
For more info on the Church of Hemp, find me.

