TWAS THE NIGHT BEFORE WIN 98
----------------------------


Twas the night before the release of win98,
and Billy boy was busy thanking the fates...

Yet another CD released in his name,
which i take great care to tarnish and maim.

He looked down at the fresh disc in his hand,
and smiled as he prepared to unleash his plan.

He told himself 'With this, soon i shall rule.'
'And to think that this bloated code makes people drool.'

'My servants cant code to save their life'
'But the PR department sure spins it up nice.'

With this, his delusions of grandeur then came to a stop.
He was startled to reality by a thud on the rooftop.

Before he could shout 'DOS', or make a mouse click,
down through the chimney came good old St Nick.

Bill was confused, and somwhat surpirsed,
after all, this was Santa in his house he surmised.

Santa looked back, a grin on his face,
just staring at Bill, as he got used to the place.

St Nick was the first to break the ice,
and said 'Bill what your doing, just isn't nice.'

'The people are sheep, you know its true.'
'For some reason, they buy whatever you do.'

'Your OS is bloated even more than me,'
'A tough thing to manage, i assure thee.'

'Vaporware works better than win98 im sure.'
'I really dont understand its alure.'

'And how about Netscape, with your mission to destroy,'
'MY GOD BILL YOUVE BEEN SUCH A BAD BOY.'

'And lately in Court you've been having problems too.'
'But even OJ could scam them, so im sure so will you.'

'And even then you wont stop, my God look what your doing!'
'Selling a hideos barney to kids to keep them cooing.'

'I liken you to Satan, with Barney your child.'
'And when you sell Satans spawn to kids Bill, it makes me really wild.'

'Yes Bill, its true, im very sorry to say,'
'Coal is all you'll be getting from me today.'

'Straighen your life out, make amends and be nice.'
'And perhaps one day your products will be worth their price.'

Now Bill up to this time, had stood there quiet,
But now had had enough from Santa to make him riot..

Santa then became quiet, and let bill speak his mind.
Somthing with which as usual, he wasted no time.

'NOBODY talks to BILL GATES that way you silly old fool.'
'Im king of sofware, I'm THE MAN, I make the competition drool.'

'I have plans of my own, and they dont include you.'
'And if you dont watch it, ill start replacing your toys too.'

'And as for barney, god i love that toy.'
'My peons somtimes fill me with joy.'

'Your finished here Santa, done for, through.'
'Now i think you should leave, back through the chimney flu.'

Santa just stared, and if this were any other year,
Santa would have dismissed Bills insults with his normal cheer.

But this year was different when Santa arose,
Cause he was really tired, and didnt feel like trading prose.

So he pulled a shiny gun out of his sack,
somthing he carried as a precaution in case of attack.

After all santa visits the bad neighborhoods too,
and getting mugged on Christmas just wouldnt do.

Bill saw the hammer cock back, as Santa tightened his grip,
His eyes bulged in disbelief, man was Santa on a trip.

Santa then laughed, the classic 'ho ho ho',
pulled the trigger, then watched down Bill go.

Lying there after the trmendous blast,
was the mighty Bill Gates with a cap in his ass.

He looked up as his life faded and said,
'Why you Santa, the jolly old man in red?'

Santa then thought before he formed his reply,
and then said to Bill with a glint in his eye...

'Sorry there Bill, im tired, and cranky too,'
'I just got up on the wrong side of the bed. Bet it happens to you.'

Bill responded 'No, thats not what i mean to say'
'I mean what are you doing up in the middle of MAY!'

Santa gasped in horror, as the color drained from his face.
Then looked at his watch to confirm this disgrace.

He looked puzzled for a bit then started to shake,
his face turned bright red, and a terrible sound he did make.

He bellowed in rage and aimed the gun at Bill once more,
And it was then that Bill sees Santas watch and knew he was done for.

The final thing Bill saw, before his brains splattered the place,
was dear old St Nicks watch, with microsoft etched on the face.


                                            -merry xmas, softhawk, GPF.
