$Unique_ID{BRK00580}
$Pretitle{Community and Social Problems}
$Title{Lost Love}
$Subject{love sadness medicine}
$Volume{Q-23}
$Log{}

Copyright (c) 1991   Tribune Media Services, Inc.


Lost Love


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QUESTION:  After giving my boyfriend all there was of me and my love, he left
without an explanation or even a good-bye.  I am left feeling empty and
worthless.  I know I can get lots of advice from other columnists, but they
are just words.  Surely a doctor must have some medicine, some pill to help me
through this terrible time?  Won't you please help me?

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ANSWER:  If I tell you that you are not alone, it is not because I am hoping
that misery likes company, but to make you realize that everyone reading this
column and your letter can remember a similar experience in their lives.  We
have all suffered the almost unbearable pain of losing the affections of a
loved one in the manner you describe, yet look around, we are all still here,
and the wounds have healed and become less painful, more bearable.  You seek
medication from me as if it could be a magic cure, and that is just not
possible.  I dread when my patients become dependent upon chemicals to blunt
the normal emotions and feelings that are a part of daily living.  It seems so
easy to "pop a pill" and feel better, but the trap is there, and soon we use
the same way out when an expected job promotion does not materialize, or when
the term paper we labored so long on comes back with a "C" instead of the "A"
we felt we deserved.  Living these days takes just a bit of courage, and the
firm belief that things do change and we can make them better if we work at
it.  I don't know how Ann Landers might handle your question, but I suspect
she may share my feelings.  You are far from worthless, and if you were here
I'd give you a big hug, hoping that might rekindle your own self esteem, but
the only medication I have to prescribe in your case is "Time".  It has cured
more cases like yours than all the pills on the Pharmacy shelf.
ÿ
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The material contained here is "FOR INFORMATION ONLY" and should not replace 
the counsel and advice of your personal physician.  Promptly consulting your 
doctor is the best path to a quick and successful resolution of any medical 
problem.
